Number Twenty Five: What? You were expecting...

Just take a minute to process this thought:
How many times a day are you disappointed by someone?

Ok, now ask yourself -- what did you expect?

We all expect different things from different people.
Some we expect to be funny.
Some we expect to be kind.
Some we expect to always be there when we need them.


Sometimes our expectations are met, but most often times they are not. Is that our problem...or those who are disappointing to us?

Well, I don't really have the answer for that one. But, I have learned to lower my expectations. I am not talking about settling for less than what you deserve, only examining and giving more breathing room to those expectations we place on others. That way, when I do become disappointed, I can stop, ask myself and even recognize if I am responsible for that.

For instance, last week a bunch of people from work went to lunch. They had mentioned it earlier in the day. I had a meeting and went to the bathroom and as I was coming back I saw the lunch group leaving...without me. They were gone for a while, taking a leisurely lunch, while I sat and stewed.

I can't believe they forgot me
I can't believe that no one waited
I can't believe that I mean so little
How am I so easy to forget
I must not mean as much as I thought to these people

They are instant thoughts that we all have, insecurities and negativities that live within us and rear their ugly heads at a moments notice.

When the group came back, I honestly will admit that I acted like a child. I sulked, was angry and very passive aggressive about what was really bothering me. The truth was, my feelings got hurt. Did anyone mean to do it? Was it done on purpose? Was it anyones fault?

No.

It wasn't anything more than I was placing my expectations on others. Do they know what my expectations were? No. Can I really fault someone for not reading my mind? No. Do I have any right to expect? No.

I could have spoken up. I could have said, "Wait for me." That's what anyone else would have done. And, honestly, that's probably what I would have normally done. So instead of expecting someone else to make it happen...perhaps I should have taken that responsibility on myself.

Perhaps, you might want to think about this as well?